Rebecca Lynn

You came into my life quite unexpectedly. Your sister was only 8 months old and I was not ready for another baby. I was very young and my marriage was falling apart. I was very confused and emotionally drained. I did not have the strength or the courage to care for you. I was all alone and had nowhere to turn. I had lost my faith in God and in myself. It was wrong of me to let you go. I wish you were here with me now. You would be sweet sixteen! You would be beautiful and full of hopes and dreams. Now all I can do is dream of what you might have become. I miss you so very much. I hope that you can forgive me for what I have done. I know now that God is never far away and that I should have trusted him to make things right. I will always love you and hope that you love me. You will always hold a special place in my heart. I am a Grandmother now and my granddaughter makes me think of you everytime I hold her. I am happy to know that you are with Jesus and in a far better place. I look forward to the day that we will be reunited in heaven. Until then, I will pray for you and your brother.

He would have been 15 years old. I miscarried him exactly 8 months after losing you. I think it was God's way of showing me how precious life can be and how painful it is to loose someone you love. It took a long time to get over the loss of you and your brother. I will never forget you.

Love,

Your Mom

Kerry (Jan.11,1998-March 11,1998),

I am very sorry for what I have done. I will never see your angelic face or hold you in my arms and kiss your sweet cheeks. I know you would have been loved and spoiled, but your Daddy and I thought we couldn't handle the responsibility, and we were very selfish and made you suffer the pain when they ripped your precious little body from me. It is something I will never forget, and I will always regret it. I ask God for his forgiveness, and also for your forgivness, my precious angel. I know you are in heaven in a safe place, and I have comfort knowing that someday I will see you and finally get to hold you in my arms forever. Sleep peacefully. We LOVE you and will never forget you, our precious baby.

Love, Mommy and Daddy

My Mary

I'll never forgive myself for the lifetime of smiles and happiness I deprived us both of, but now is the time to move on.

I'll always love you sweetheart, and knowing that one day l'll hold you next to me is all the hope I need.

Forever in my heart

Mummy

Andrew and Clara

Love,
your mommy

William or Jennifer

You were only 3 months old when I let you go. I just want you to understand that I did love you and your father loved you too. We just could not have given you the love and life that we want to be able to give our children. It really hurts me to think about it now. I don't know if I would have done what I have done if I knew I would feel this way. I just want you to know that even though I never saw you, I never felt you, I never held you in my arms, you are still a part of me, and I will never forget you. On March 23, 1998 you would have been born, that day will always be a haunting reminder of what I said I would never do. I had to do it, I had no choice, I could not have given you up for adoption, I loved you too much, I could never have let you go that way. I know maybe I took the easy way out, but it is better for me to remember you, than to worry if you were being raised right and wondering if you would ever know me. I love you always and will never forget.

All My Love
Your Mommy

Ashtin

I'm so sorry now for what I did to you Ashtin. I regret what I did to you. Just as soon as I came out of that surgery room I cried for you and realized I had made the wrong decision. I wish I could change what I did to you, but I can't. I beg for your forgiveness. The doctors never told me if you were a girl or a boy, but I know in my heart that your my daughter. I dream about you quit often. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you. If I hadn't aborted you, you would be due for delivery in a couple of weeks. Oh what I would do for the chance to have you back. When I made the decision to abort you I thought I had all the good reasons in the world for making that decision. I know now that those reasons I had could have been changed. I haven't told to many people about you because I am so ashamed for what I did to you. The day that I went to the hospital I not only lost you but I lost a part of my heart and my life at the same time.My precious Ashtin your mom is not a real big religious person, but I do believe that your in God's arms right now, and I promise you we will be together again someday. When that day comes for us to be together again I promise to make things right this time. I will never forget about you and will never ever stop loving you Ashtin.

In loving memory, ASHTIN my little girl that I miss so dearly: I love you more than the whole wide world and back again, that is what I tell your brother every night before he goes to sleep, and I also say it to you in my prayers for you. I love you Ashtin.

Your Mother.

Ashtin June 1997 ~~August 1997

Christopher

"He has not dealt with us according to our sins, Nor rewarded us according to our iniquities. As far as the east is from the west, So far has He removed our transgressions from us. ' Psalm 103 vs. 10 & 12

Dear Christopher,
Even though it has been almost 20 years, your dad and I haven't forgotten. Neither have your sisters and brother here on this earth. Your family all miss you! We put our hope in the fact that God has provided a way for us to see you again. I'm sorry I've missed out on all the precious times we would have shared. The playing, movie watching, walks in the woods, arguing over chores... All of the things that make family memories. It's as if there is always a shadow, or empty space, in our family times. The birthday celebrations we've missed and the times your sisters wished their big brother was on the playground to defend them.... There are no words to contain all that we've missed by the decision to end your life. I know I'm forgiven and I'm So thankful! But that doesn't erase the sadness of all that could have been. I Love You Forever.
Your Mom,
Nancy

A Father's Prayer

Your mother became pregnant with you fourteen years ago. We were very scared at the time. We were afraid of how your life would impact our lives and restrict us from the things we wanted to do and have. I was especially afraid of what our friends and family would think as your mother and I were not yet married. We were ashamed. Not of you. But of our disobedience to God and our parents. I chose to hide our shame through the lie of abortion. It was a cowardly act for which I am deeply sorry to God, to your mother and to you. I take comfort in knowing that God has forgiven your mother and me, and has received you into heaven. I praise God that He is able to overcome my sin and will one day unite us in His family. Know this my child, your father and mother love you deeply.

Your father.

Jayme

Heavenly Father,

I thank You for Your forgiveness and grace. I will never forget the child I chose to kill through abortion, nor do I want to forget. I will always long to hold her, yet You have given me Your Son and His salvation and I have His strength to carry me on. Jayme will always be in my heart and I pray that because of my abortion experience I may share Your love with someone else and save them from the agony and shame I have known. I love You, Lord. I love you, Jayme.

Linda, In Loving Memory of Jayme, Dec. 3, 1992 - Jan. 15, 1993

Arielle

With Love,
Your Mommy

Merideth

You are a beautiful soul and I believe you came to me for a purpose. I think about you all the time and I want you to know that if you hadn't come to me I would’ve never known what a mother's love could be. When I was growing up, Grandma and Grandpa were very mean to me. I was often told what a nuisance I was to them. As I became an adult, I had internalized these negative messages. My survival instincts shut off any desire I might have had for my own children someday. When I very unexpectedly found out I was pregnant with you, those instincts took over and I chose to have an abortion. I ask that you please forgive me. I know that I now know things happen for a reason. My short time with you changed the years and years of hurtful messages I had gotten from my family growing up. I made the best decision I could make at the time, and though in so doing I lost you forever, I believe that it is due to our short time together that I might one day be able to have a planned, very much wanted and loved child of my own. You are a beautiful spirit who was compassionate to spend some of your time with me on this earth. Daddy tries to take care of me as best he can because I still feel so much sadness over letting you go. Mommy and Daddy love you very much and we think about you always. Please watch over us from Heaven and forgive us for not welcoming you into our lives.

Love,
Your Mommy

Molly or Mitchell

Your mom forever, Tami

Tennessee

A mother's story:

your mother

Letter to my son,

Love Always,

MOMMY

Aaron James,

Baby I love you more than you will ever know,

mama

A Poem for Aaron James...

Aaron James,

How can I explain a hurt, that runs so far and deep inside?
I can laugh and smile, but the crying doesn't subside.
To me, it's like the ocean, which seems so blue and clear.
But when you go down deep, its full of darkness and fear.
It seems like it goes on forever, that the happiness would never end.
But then you reach the shore of reality, that sometimes isn't a friend.
But after every ocean, there's a lake, which eventually runs into a stream.
So, I pray for you the pain will lesson, and maybe soon it won't be so extreme.

To say good-bye to yesterday, I must dream about tomorrow.
Use the waters of the future, to drown away my sorrow.
For the past will never live again.
Only the memories exist.
I can never buy back my yesterdays. no matter how hard I wish.

Like a piece of glass shattered into a thousand pieces.
I sit ... shocked and broken hearted, in the silent darkness.
Confused, lonely, empty, and deprived of the passion and youthful spirit I possessed yesterday.
Foolishly believing the sun would forever shine on me.
A very priceless and valued love ..... vanished.
Like the sun at sundown, leaving my tender heart astray.
Desperately needing a gentle voice to console my sorrows.
To mend my shattered heart.

I love you,

Moma------

Baby,

Mommy

Bryant

How I dreamed about you before you ever existed! I dreamed of a life with your father and your sister and you. I so wanted us to be a family.

Finding out about you was bittersweet. Although distraught with grief over losing your sister, I saw the good in you. I believed with all my heart that God was giving us back a gift that He, for His own reason, had just tragically taken from us. I wanted you. I wanted to give your father back a little of what had been taken away from him. Your sister had been his only child, and the love of his life. Although he had spoken in the past of having more children, in his grief-stricken state, he had changed his mind. He no longer wanted any more children.

My decision came down to which of our lives mattered the most and which to make the less painful. Mine and yours, or his. I chose his. I thought I would rather do the thing that I find so morally wrong, than have him to suffer any more than he already had. And in the end, I not only lost you and your sister, but also your father. In a matter of three short weeks, I lost the three things I wanted and loved the most.

For seventeen months I have struggled with depression, despair, and guilt over what I did to you. I forgave your father a long time ago for not wanting you. You came along at a very traumatic time for him, and I sometimes wonder if I had been strong and fought for you to be born, if he would be greatful for you today?

A day doesn't go by that I don't think about all of you.....and my heart breaks. The only comfort I have is knowing you are in Heaven with your sister.....and in knowing I did give her the little sibling she wanted. I know with all my heart that she is every bit of the big sister I always imagined she would be. Dear Bryant, even though your father and I are no longer together, you are a lifetime bond that I will forever have with him and Brandy, and I will carry you all in my heart.

Little Lost Child

In Loving Memorium to My Little Lost Child who was deliberately taken from me July 30, 1997.

You were part of me for only 9 weeks, so I do not know whether you were a boy or a girl. I wanted so much to keep you, so I had named you almost immediately. If you were a boy, your name would have been John Brian - after your father- and if you would have been a girl; I would have named you Melissa Rose, after your grandmother. I am not a religious woman, little one of mine, but I am I so thankful to have found this small caring space to put your name ; a place that I can turn to in times of sorrowful remembrance - even though you were only an inch long , you were never anything less than a human being to me..a precious child that I wanted but was not strong enough to keep. It has only been two weeks since you were taken, and my heart is so heavy with sorrow and I am filled with such overwhelming regret for this thing I have done to you. But you are gone from me now forever.....I hope there is a Loving God and a safe place for you in his cradle......For it is the only thought that affords me with a modicum of solace. I hope that I truly will be reunited with you some day.....to hold you and love you as I will never be able to do here on earth. I want you to know, little John or Melissa, that I love you and you will remain in my heart forever. I will never forget you my sweet child..... It is an terrible price you paid but it is through you that I have come to deeper understand the sanctity of life, both born and unborn. I shall never forget you. Your birthday would have been around the end of February, 1998. I will always remember and be holding you even closer to me ," my eyes are filled with tears and my heart with wanting." I love you my child....your mother, Susan.

To Eric

I had dreams of us becoming a family and being happy . I don't see the same dreams anymore, all I want is my child in my life again. You mean so much to me, but from up above I am sure you know that. I cry all the time thinking about what could have been. You trusted me to help you become someone and all I did was take that away from you. I am so sorry. On your birthday every year from now on your mommy and daddy will send a special prayer for you, to show you we will always care.

"You are a angel in heaven"
December 19th 1996-March 12th 1997

Dear Baby Maxx

Love Always,

Your Mommy

*BABY MAXX* ~ APRIL 24 - AUGUST 13, 1997 ~

Aaron James

Moma

Dear Alexis or Stephen,

Your mommy,
Chris

Dear Sarah Nadine,

Accalia Nicole

... She dances with the wind through the sky above me, if she forgives me or not, I may never know... I see her running through beautiful colored flowers, blonde hair flying in the wind... my only way of holding on to you, is loving your dad who is still here. Yet I am so alone...

Dear Baby

I constantly think about you. I wonder what you would look like. Sometimes I look at the sky and it makes me want to cry because you are up there instead of here with me. I know you are in good hands up there in Heaven, but I wish you were here with me in my arms!! I often wonder if you have forgiven me for what I did. I wish so bad that I could trade places with you!! I am so sorry for not giving you a chance!! My life has not been the same since the day that you were taken from my body. I remember the day I had my abortion like it was yesterday. I often wonder if I am going to hell for what I did. I have not yet, and don’t know if I ever will forgive myself for what I did to you. I am so sorry for what I have done!!!!! Please forgive me!!!!! You will be in my thoughts and in my heart as long as I live!!!!

Love Always and Forever,

MOM

Sunshine

May peace and love be with you and, hopefully, you understand that I had unconditional love for you despite what I did. All the love in the world to you up in heaven.

Pure and unconditional love always, You were a flower
Plucked before you could bloom
The sun that never got to shine
A complete surprise in my tummy
Who ate my food and said it was yummy
Who's life I took
And with one last look
I knew the choice I made
Was completely wrong
And for everything now I would trade
For it wasn't really so long
But it's too late
I sealed your fate
And blew your candle out
Before you came about
I love you
I miss you
Please forgive me
From the Heaven's above
Filled with eternal love
Cradled in God's arms
And in his heart
As now we will always be apart

Love,

Your Mother
Janice Marie Foote

Jeremy

Your earthly mother,

DAWN

Faith

Your Mommy,

Jen

David

Dear David,

I will never forget the happiness that you gave me, even if it was for just a short time. For the first time in my life I felt pure, unconditional love. Just the thought of you growing inside me gave me an indescribable feeling and I knew I was no longer facing the world alone but we would be doing it together. You were conceived the summer of 1996, just before I left home for college. Your grandmother's dream was for me to graduate from college and be the successful person she knew I could be. You were not in her plans for my future. She wanted me to wait and live my own life before I started a family. She had me when she was 17 and she promised herself she would not let me face the hardships she faced. So I listened to her and blocked out all my feelings. At the time of the abortion I remember screaming to myself "they're killing my baby!" and then feeling the tears roll down the side of my face because I knew you were gone and I had been able to fight for you.

Not a day goes by that I do not think about you and wonder what you are like, I know you are beautiful. You would be 3 months old right now if you were here but I know you are in a better place now and all you feel is the love and warmth of God's arms. Please don't ever think I didn't want you or don't love you. Your daddy thinks that when we do decide to have a baby that it will be the same one we gave to heaven. I know that is not true, you are special and there was only one of you. I look forward to the day when I can look into your big, beautiful brown eyes and tell you how sorry I am. Until then I promise to never forget you and keep your spirit alive.

PLEASE FORGIVE YOUR MOMMY!!
I Love You,
Ali

"...forever...a part of my heart..."

The choice to abort you was not mine and I know that I am forgiven for not having the strength to fight back. I was only a child myself and the abuse from my father was something that I could not bring another innocent child to endure. I thought I was protecting you and I didn't know that there were other ways to do that. I know that with Jesus you are safe and happy which is everything that I wanted for you. I was not strong enough to protect you because I couldn't protect myself.

I watch your brothers as they grow and I wonder what you would have looked like at their age. I wonder what it would be like for them to have an older brother or sister. I wonder if you are the daughter that I may never hold. But more than that I wonder if you will ever know how much you are loved and missed. I used to wonder if the pain would ever go away, but that pain is all that I have of you and I don't ever want it to go away.

I know that you are in heaven with Grandma now and I know that she will care for you. I love you.

Hannah

Mommy

Celena

Love, Mommy (Andrea)

Christopher

In memory of my son Christopher who lives with God. (December 1, 1987 - April 6, 1988)

My Little One

Dear Noah

I am sorry, Noah, for not having faith in God when you were with me. I never prayed to God for help, because I did not know the kind of God that He is. Forgive me, Noah, for not reaching out to God, or allowing other people to help me.

I wish I could turn back time and change the events of the day the I killed you. The day that you were sucked out of my womb to lay slaughtered in a cold silvery coffin. Haw awful for you. Will you forgive me, Noah, for doing this to you? Some people believe that you were not a child when I killed you, but every time I close my eyes you are there, as a child and you grow and age as time goes by.

Today, you would be around 10 years of age, and I wonder what you would be like. I wonder what would make your eyes light up with joy, or darken with sadness. I wonder what it would feel like to have your hand in mine, to hear your laugh and to hug you.

I wish I could embrace you, take back the pain I caused you and have you in my life to raise with so much love and devotion.

I have chosen this name for you because of its meaning. Noah means "comforter," rest," "peace" and its spiritual meaning is "provider of refuge." It is a beautiful name for a beautiful child. Your spirit lives in my heart and I long for you. Because of what I have done, I have been tormented with grief, guilt and loss.

I no longer want to think of you in those terms. I will remember you as Noah, for being at rest, peaceful at heart, and the provider of refuge for the other children whose mothers have aborted them. Welcome them in heaven, as God has welcomed you.

Noah, live gloriously in heaven, as you will forever in my heart. By the mercy of God's grace, I can be forgiven and given the chance to be united with you someday. Blessed be God for His kindness.

Good-bye Noah. When you look down upon the earth, see the unending love that is in my heart for you and know that you have a family. Watch over your brothers and sisters that God may bless Steve and I with one day.

Forever loving you,

Kara

Derrin

Love, Mommy (Andrea)

Little One

mommy

Precious

Jennifer

Christian

Amy

Lost One

A phrase that has carried me on through my life is: "Only God can make lemon-ade out of lemons." Through my faith and trust in God, I promise I will not let the life I took from you be in vain. I hear the cry of you and all the lost children pleading for us to teach the world that abortion is not the answer to an untimely pregnancy.

One day you and I will meet. But until then, I hope you can find comfort in the arms of God.

forever missing you.
forever loving you,
Mom (Melanie Schurr)

Hannah

My hannah. I am 17. I live alone and am on a full ride to college to become a dentist.

I miss her. She was the only thing I have given up on in life.

Hannah, I am so sorry.

I had my boyfriend help me pay, but he is not the baby's father. My best friend had to drive me there. The baby's father was with his girlfriend that day.

I can't say I don't miss her and I am very much lonely now.

She was beautiful that first night I dreamed of her and she has been every night since. I just wanted you to know her like I did.

Hannah's Mom

Joy Serenity

"Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, a gentle Father and the God of all consolation who comforts us in our sorrows, so that we can offer others, in their sorrows, the consolation that we have recieved from God ourselves." II Corinthians 1:3,4

Teresa Collins