This comes from the bottom of my heart, it may sound odd to or even callous, but I really truly no longer have any pain in the areas of either my abortion or my miscarriages. That which the Son sets free is free indeed, and He has freed me so from the guilt and the shame of all that happened. I believe the Lord allowed my second child to die in a miscarriage out of His grace and mercy. If it had not been the death of that child, I might never have come to terms with my abortion, my part in it, or the role of others. If I had never done that, I would have lived my life full of unforgiveness, and that would have eventually destroyed me. I often explain it this way. Abortion, is like a big open infested wound. We try to bury it under bandages, but it only serves to deepen the infection and the damage it does. The Lord in all His faithfulness, removed that bandage, and slowly but surely cleaned out all the infection, He even had to scrub some of it out, and it hurt... oh how it hurt, in some ways, the healing hurt more than the wound, but when it healed, it healed for good. And now, when you see me, there is a scar there, a defining mark, but it doesn't hurt. In fact, instead of being a reminder of the pain, I wear my "scar" as though it were a Badge of Honor. You see, it does not represent my sin, or my failure to me. To me, my badge, my scar, is a symbol for all the world to see, to show them what Jesus is so capable of. And it is a testimony to what He did in my life. So, I wear that badge, that scar, with pride, and I give all the glory behind it to Him. There is no pain. God has restored, that which the locusts destroyed, and what the enemy meant for evil, He meant for good.

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