Gracie Nicole was the name I had chosen for my little girl, had I not aborted her. I don't know why I did it. Sometimes I think back and it isn't me I see. I have a 5-year old son, and I had just finished nursing school, at 25 I was finally independent, then I find out I'm pregnant. I saw the pregnancy as a way to take my freedom I had wanted for so long. Now I have awful mood swings, headaches, depression,and I cry for no reason, sometimes I can't even figure out why I'm crying. I can't talk to anyone about this, because I don't want them to remember the horrible thing I did. I feel like I should leave my husband, my reasoning is if I killed his child, do I really love him? He knows about the abortion, discussed it with him, before, and he took me to have it done, because I gave him no choice. He tried to talk me out of it, but I wouldn't listen. I wish I had not killed my child, I hate myself, I know that I am a terrible person. Sometimes I want to get pregnant, but my husband said I cannot ever bring that baby back. When I really think about it, I feel desperate and I cant breathe, because I've done something I can never take back.