How to Plan a Stress-less Wedding

It’s impossible to plan a wedding without some stress. But there are ways to try and keep it to the very minimum.

Here are some suggestions:

Discuss what you want as a couple. Though the wedding is usually the bride’s territory, you should both talk about what you want. If your fiancé wants to let you do all the planning then that’s okay. But he may have ideas and suggestions of his own if you give him a chance to express them.

Don’t feel forced into an expensive extravaganza unless that is what your truly want and can afford. Seriously think about taking on long-term debt. In a few years you may wish you had saved that money for a down payment on a house or decorating a nursery.

Think of the long-term goals of your marriage not just the short-term of planning a one day event.

Make a budget and stick to it. It will seem frustrating now, but starting your married life with a pile of debt will cause much more stress in the long run.

Choose what is most important to you as a couple. Then you can cut back on other things.

Talk to your family about what you want. If your parents are paying for your wedding they may feel they should be included in the planning. Many mothers try to create the wedding they always wished they had. Though it’s a sweet thought, it may be completely different from what you want.

Family members can be the most stressful part of any wedding. You need to try and deal with this situation up front. Assign jobs to family members and your bridal party. This will keep you from having to do everything. It will also make clear up front what you want each person to do, hopefully keeping them from trying to step into other areas.

No one likes to talk about money. But it will stop future problems if you know how much, if any, your parents can help.

Also, there are traditionally items that the bride’s family pays for and others, such as the rehearsal dinner, the groom’s family pays for. However, because many couples are older when they marry they pay for a lot of the wedding on their own. This is especially true of second marriages.

If your parents aren’t able to help with the costs it’s imperative to know this in advance so you and your fiancé will know the cost is on you. You don’t want to bring high credit card debt into the marriage that your spouse didn’t know existed. This guarantees a rough start to a marriage.

But if your parents are willing to foot the bill, then you need to be honest with them about what you want. They may be expecting you to have a large, traditional wedding and you might want something casual at the beach. Deal with this in the beginning.

If you want a larger wedding than your parents can afford then it will be up to you and your fiancé to fund the extra expenses. Don’t force your parents to take on debt or raid their retirement accounts.

The best way to avoid stress is to — Plan ahead.

Get a calendar. You can use an online version or an old-fashioned printed one. But note everything that needs to be done and by when. Track when deposits and final payments are due.

Keep a folder of all paperwork that involves the wedding. You don’t want to have to search for anything. You can file papers according to categories such as, flowers, caterer, venue, musicians, etc.

Consider hiring a wedding planner. They can be costly, but are often worth the price for the stress they take off of you. They’ll know all the venues in the area as well as the vendors.

In some cases, wedding planners can save you money by saving you all the time you’d need running around interviewing vendors.  They won’t have to talk with each florist because they’ve already used them all.

Before hiring a wedding planner ask for references. Talk to past clients and get their feedback.

You want a professional but you need someone who makes you feel comfortable. You don’t want to feel intimidated or forced to make choices you’re not comfortable with.

This is still your big day and the final decisions are up to you and your fiancé.

Take a few days throughout your planning time to spend a whole day or even a weekend wedding free. In other words, you and your fiancé take a break from wedding talk and enjoy each other’s company.

Have a pamper day with your girlfriends where you go to the spa and just relax.

Try your best not to turn into Bridezella. In you become a nervous wreck everyone else will follow suit. Stay calm.

Finally, even though you want everything to be perfect just accept that it won’t. There will be some small glitches that will make a wonderful story to tell your grandchildren.

Keep the big picture in mind.

Relax and enjoy your big day!